Sunday, January 17, 2010

It’s been on my mind to post an entry for days. But it’s been more a desire simply to keep up with the blog, and not really a story bubbling up inside, wanting to be written down. From the first, my blog has been a place to share with friends what is going on in my life, both the outer circumstances and the inner changes and awarenesses. I call it my journal. But I want to write when I am moved to do so, not simply to fill up a page.

January is a cold and silent month. We’ve taken down the holiday decorations, and the house and yard look a little barren and forlorn. We’re in the aftermath of the holiday season and the celebrations are over. Now it’s back to the mundane business of our everyday lives.

As dreary days of fog and rain pile up, one atop the other, I feel a familiar heaviness knocking on the door of my heart. But I’ve been here before. The winter months of dark skies and cold, wet weather want to drag me down. But in the morning as I meditate, the song of a bird lifts my spirits. It reminds me that spring and rebirth lay not too far in the future. There is no need to be fearful. Rather, I will sit awhile with the grayness, and give my body over to the slower pace of these winter months. Renewal is taking place all around me, and also within me, even though I may not see it. Can I generously open my heart to the dark, to the quiet, to the cold? I feel that I am beginning to do so, and in return I am being gifted with the peace that comes from acceptance. In trusting the season, fear ebbs from my heart and in its place, calm settles in.

All is as it is meant to be.

6 comments:

  1. You are the sunshine of my life, even in the winter.

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  2. Mary, I enjoyed this blog and understand completely your comments about January. For some reason, this has alway been a difficult month for me. I think I am always trying to figure out what I should be doing with my life at a new beginning. Trusting is not easy for me..... I am thankful for the rain that is filling our reservoirs, I love to go to bed and hear the rain falling outside. I feel safe and secure under my blankets. The rainbow will come! Love, Tess

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  3. Thank you, Tess. It seems so many of us are weighted down in these dark winter months. Knowing that I'm not alone as I wrestle with the gloom, the cold and the fog (both within and without) warms me and gives me the sense that we'll all get through it together! Love, Mary

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  4. Wow Mary, I just watched your slide show, you are a wonderful photographer and are such a great computer "geek." ( Of course you know that I mean this in a positive way) I'm jealous. Tess

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  5. Again, thank you Tess...I take your comments in the most positive way! Mary

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  6. Thank you for your thoughtful and open sharing, Mary. Your blog is such a gift as you let us into the rich and insightful way you experience life. Winter has always been such a struggle for me. This year, finally, I've made some peace with it by surrendering to it more. I received a lovely poem about this from a friend. She gave me permission to reprint it on my blog. Here's a link to the blog post so you can read it. http://www.meditationoasis.com/2010/01/15/winter-as-meditation/

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